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Childhood photos, nostalgia

Where did it all start?

The confused child that you see on the left is in fact me. As soon as I started walking there was no chance that I would ever get into a stroller again. After I figured out that walking gave you the freedom to explore the world yourself, I stared running around. 

I was born in Moscow, Russia and have lived there until the age of 8. I remember specifically getting a silk pillow for my 8th birthday with my face on it. Then me and my family moved to United Arab Emirates, Ras Al Khaimah. It was a 40 minute drive away from Dubai, just to give you an idea. The reason we moved away from Russia was mainly for me and my brother's futures. My parents wanted to show us the world, they encouraged us to learn English as it's the main language that connects people in this world. Growing up in RAK was the best experience. Most people in my class were either Arabic or international.  I had filipino, Australian, English, Canadian and Spanish friends. Moving abroad taught me that we are all the same. How we choose to perceive other's happens due to our conditioning and upbringing. 

After living in RAK for five years we set out to New Zealand, Auckland. New Zealand is probably one of the furthest countries I would have ever been to at that point. Leaving my friends and saying goodbye we left for a new beginning. As much as I was excited, I was also terrified. At this point I was nearing the age of 13. Crazy hormones, puberty and acne. Everything you would expect a teenager to have. I remember my first day of school, it was Year 9 and I didn't know anyone. In UAE kids stay kids for longer. In New Zealand kids grew up much faster. The contrast between the two countries hit me like a stone. I was lost, having to restart and remake the life I knew.  However, my beginning  flourished beautifully. I made friends, had the most high school teenage movie experience ever and lived passionately every single day. My goal was to be myself yet not go overboard where people would start noticing that I was different. I had that feeling of needing to fit in. 

My friends always knew that I was the positive one. I loved my constant positivity and the way I expressed it. I was always passionate and emotional. I always wanted my friends and the loved ones around me to open up. Now that's when I found out that quality would be sticking along with me through every journey.  Time had come where my parents decided to move back to Moscow. After living with my friends for two years, studying and having no parents around (I went a little too crazy) I moved back to Moscow. 

Moscow gave me the most calming sense of home I have ever felt since living there in my childhood. At first I denied the move. I denied the growth. I denied this new journey. I felt tired of moving around. I had to leave my friends and the life I knew behind, again. The language I adopted wasn't needed anymore. My mind was craving peace and security yet I knew I couldn't find it in my surroundings. I had to change my perspective on it all. I decided to finally look inwards and face every explosion of my emotion that was begging to be found. 

Currently I live In Canada. Yes I did move again with my parents. Out of all the places in Canada we settled in the outskirts of Toronto. Oshawa, probably the most random place a human being can ever move to. This time, I am not denying this move. My heart is full, my eyes are open and my feet are grounded. 

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